You are who you are; never apologize for that!
I”m a huge believer in finding comfort in the skin you’re in. We are all exactly who we are supposed to be (well unless you are harming people).
If you have yet to experience people questioning why you are the way you are, you will. They are out there and coming your way. And when they get to you, please ignore them. Giving toxic people your attention will only feed into their bullshit energy.
You see, their purpose is to show up, steal your joy and suck the life out of you. Wanting you to be just as miserable as they are, but we are smarter than to let this happen. Have you heard the word gaslight before?
Well, it means, just as it sounds, toxic folks will say things they know will get you fired up, literally pouring gasoline over you and waiting for you to light the match. I know this feeling oh too well. I used to let people I thought had my best intentions in mind gaslight me. Then they play the victim when you put your foot up their ass.
Listen, the last thing we need to do is pay attention to words that are spewing from the mouth of a moron.
They talk
They judge
They gossip
They are miserable
They constantly feel my best friend Karma kick them in the ass
They will watch you as you prosper while they decline
Let them be exactly who they are!
LIFE will take care of them. All you need to do is embrace everything about you. Your strongest characteristics are the ones that are the most intimidating for those that are making every attempt at manipulating you.
But you’ll make the gaslighters go away when you believe and say; I am who I am, I own that, and I apologize for nothing!
Go be great!
You could have chosen any blog to read, but you chose mine, and I’m honored!
~Belladonna~


I’m definitely done with toxicity. T’hell with them.
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Me too!!!
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You’re doing it again Belladonna! You’re reading my mind. I’m getting ready to start a new work project and I started to have some doubts. I gave myself a lecture saying close to these same words. A good reminder. Thank you!🙂🙂🙂🙂😎
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You? Have doubt? Brian you better shoot for the moon, it has your name written all over it!
I’m so glad you liked this and that it spoke to you.
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Oh I’ve got a few doubts. I’m managing though! Thank you for the encouragement!!!!!
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You’re going to do great!
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So true, Belladonna. Great advice 💕
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Thanks for this idea.Anita
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Sometimes the gaslighting is so strong yet hidden so you may not realize the harm they are doing to you! If your life is better once they are gone, then you have extinguished their fire on you! I know I’m feel stronger and lighter without their negativity!
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Yesssssssss for sure Kristina! I so agree with you. It feels so good when they are no longer able to set you on fire.
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Well said, Belladonna! Thanks for sharing.
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Thank you KK!!!!!
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My pleasure!
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Good words to take away Bella, thank you 🙂
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Hey Simon!!!! Thank you so much!
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Always 🙂
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This is definitely good advice to take in.
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Thank you Matt! It took me years to stop allowing the person to gaslight me. Feels good when you are free from it.
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I have witnessed karma in action (or at least how I define karma), which is basically people getting their just deserts. Sometimes it takes a looooong time!
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Paula it take way tooooo long sometimes but when it happens it happens in a big way.
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Oh no, not “the last thing we need to do is pay attention to words that are spewing from the mouth of a moron.” Girlfriend you know I mic-dropped this reminder. 🤜🏼🤛🏼 You don’t have to tell me twice! 😱
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LOL! You are the best Kym!
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Girlfriend, you keep me on my toes and I love it! 🥰💖😍
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Same to you Kym!
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🤗🥂😍💖😘
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You’re great! Thank you for these empowering words, Coach!
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Thank you a million times, I appreciate you so much!
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Likewise! 🙏🏻🤗
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Life will take care of them-I am hoping this is true and if I were a betting person or it runs in the family, I might take a little bet. Thanks for this.
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Thank you! Wowwwwww you are on to something with that and you are so right!
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Ah yes, well said
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Thank you Sadje!
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You’re most welcome
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Yes!
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Thank you so much for reading Rosaliene!
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Wow! Great advise!
Thank’s for share dear Belladonna.
Have a wonderful Friday!
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Thank you so much Elvira!!! Truly appreciate you.
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Always a pleasure visit your blog dear Bella.
As wel appreciate you.
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Gaslighting is bad and when it comes from someone you trust, you might not see it immediately. Good post.
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You are right! You don’t see it because you don’t expect it. Thank you Vanya!
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I remind myself often that is isn’t my job to fulfill someone neurotic perceptions of me because they’re stuck on insecure mode. I’ll forgive their rants… but only at a healthy distance.
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Yes to this!!!! I agree with ya completely
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This is such an important piece. True, we are who we are and we need to watch our energy, always keep it positive by watching our environment- people around us and what we consume from the external.
I barely have that problem since I’ve really reduced my circle of friends to only a few manageable number.
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Thank you so much Kinge! Narrowing you friend group was a great step. The smaller the circle brings the most peace.
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Welcome, yes..
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I am FINALLY at a place in life where other peoples’ thoughts of me do not matter. I’m also at a point of not worrying and understanding that life is life and I have no real control of it. I am feeling a peace that I have never felt before and I love it 😍
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I love that Angela! It’s a beautiful place to be.
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I’ve had this situation several times in my life, and I’ve discovered it’s always best to be done with those people. You can’t win when you are in a relationship with them. Thank you for sharing.
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Absolutely agree with you Molly! Well said!
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One of my neighbours is such a typical gaslighter and it was really annoying but I decided to just ignore him and not engage.
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Good for you! What an ass, and I’m sure he is a miserable person.
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Yup, absolutely. It’s just so weird to me when people lie so obviously and try to gaslight others. I wonder if it actually ever works.
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Yes it works more than not! People who gaslight have very abbrassive personalties and take advantage of more laid back people.
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That’s so sad!
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It really is!
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Giving toxic people your attention will only feed into their bullshit energy.
It took me decades to realize this. I labored under the impression that by being around non-toxic people the toxic ones would learn to be better. HA! Joke was on me.
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Ally I’m guilty of that too! But we know better now and we know how to keep our peace.
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This is so important! Thank you for this!
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Thank you so much Kymber, I’m so glad you like this.
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I hear you.
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Thank you for Janice!
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that’s the comment section of pretty much every facebook post…the trick is to ignore them……I think the thing is to trust and believe in yourself…we should be able to cheer for that person we see in the morning each day
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I know that’s right Warren!!!!
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If you can change your mindset and be free from the toxicity, then you can accomplish a lot even with haters on your back. Absolutely love your write-up 😘☺️
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You better believe it! Thank you for saying that. Toxicity will always be there but we don’t have to be!
Thank you for your comment!
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Indeed, never apologize!!
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You know that’s right!
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Really true Belladonna 💕
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Thank you Cindy!
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Thanks for the nice and positive way to keep yourself safe from those who are not. Love your attitude. Wonderful my friend. Big hugs, keep us the great work!
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Thanks Joni! Gotta stay away from that crazy energy.
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🌹🦋
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Wow! Great post! I have a distant relative who gaslights people constantly. Although I can’t completely avoid her, I can control her affect on me. That’s something I really need to work on. Thanks for the reminder. All the best!
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There ya go!!! That’s all we can do!
Thank you for stopping by.
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Awesome 👍
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Thank you.
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You are right dear same situation most of people face and absorb.
Annoying Criticism Solution

rewrite “I have faced people who exist to criticise others . how I sit how I sleep why I don’t talk to much why I am so skinny and lots of stupid objections. main objection was why I don’t know too much about other people.and funniest thing why I don’t match with them despite of becoming a part of their family (after being married) months before my marriage I had lost my mom of brain clot.how much disturbed I was at that time and this situation had made it worst.how stupid I was that I started trying to change myself unconsciously and I don’t know since when I developed anxiety issue that is still part of my life now I am 49 and I really feel that I was not as odd as they made me realise.they were having some good as well as some problems in their personalities and so was me.i was not someone out of this world. I request all such people inspite of focusing on other people just try to explore yourself. your harsh words rude attitude can ruin someone’s life and you will be answerable to Allah if here in this world that person is not reacting every one is not by nature to understand this behaviour and react accordingly in defence.so to all such people who exist just to annoy others i want to say “Mind your own business” every one is much better than you”
ChatGPT
“I’ve encountered individuals whose sole purpose seems to be criticizing others – from how I sit, to how I sleep, to why I don’t talk much or my body size, and countless other trivial objections. The main issue they had was my lack of knowledge about other people, and to top it off, they found it amusing that I didn’t fit in with them even after becoming part of their family through marriage.
Prior to getting married, I experienced a major upheaval in my life with the loss of my mother due to a brain clot. The turmoil of that time compounded with my new situation, leading me to unconsciously attempt to change myself. Somewhere along the way, I developed anxiety, which has continued to affect me throughout my life.
Now, at 49 years old, I’ve come to realize that I wasn’t as peculiar as they made me believe. They had their strengths and weaknesses, just as I did. I wasn’t an outsider or someone extraordinary; I was simply being myself.
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Keep being just as you are!!!!!
I’m so sorry about your mother, many prayers and hugs to you💖
As far as others making you feel like you aren’t enough, YOU ARE!
Regardless of your size, or anything else. I am so happy that you are things differently now. Thank you for sharing this comment, I appreciate you so much!💖💖💖
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The whole time I was reading it went straight to my heart. Thank you for that!
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Thank you so much for telling me that. ‘m so glad you liked it. I appreciate you reading.
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so true Bella! I love this! Thanks for posting this! Xo
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Thank you so much for reading Carol Anne
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The most toxic people in my life were family members and some supervisors at work. Not to get sucked in is very hard, when its family members. The work related problems I solved by changing jobs.
One can’t just change one’s family 😉 but it is really necessary to distance oneself from the negative emotions. My elder brother even tried to hurt my younger brother and me beyond the grave, but by then I was able to deal with it. How can people live like that? With so much anger, jealousy and general negativity?
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Now this is aa converdsation that can’t be ignored. Family can be and is the biggest headache. They cross boundaries and then feel like they can come smile in your face like nothing happened. But I’m her to say FUCK that! Apologies are needed or cutting you off is a must.
I’m so sorry about your brother!
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He was a very unhappy person …
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Sounds like it!
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