Posted on by Belladonna

Where is the fairness in that?

Whenever we face a situation where we put in more effort than others but receive less recognition, or when we witness an innocent person suffering, the first thought that comes to mind is, ‘This isn’t fair.’

However, when things are going well, we often look for reasons to justify why we ‘deserve’ all the positivity coming our way. But what does it really mean to ‘deserve’ something? Is it based on our actions, our circumstances, or a combination of both? And how does this concept of ‘deserving’ intersect with the unfairness we perceive in the world?

The anguish that grips your heart when you witness someone in pain prompts the question, ‘Why must they suffer?’ This is a person who embodies goodness, who contributes positively to society, their family, and their friends. Yet, they are failed by an uncontrollable force, a force that strips them of their very essence. In these moments, empathy becomes a powerful tool, allowing us to step into their shoes and understand their suffering, and even motivating us to take action to alleviate it.

On the other hand, you might find yourself comparing this person to someone who is a menace to society in every sense, yet remains pain-free, enjoys good health, and is often a significant source of frustration. This person has the audacity to take their health or undeserved wealth for granted, a stark contrast to the innocent sufferer, highlighting the stark injustice in the world.

So, where is the fairness in that? It’s a question that often lingers in our minds, challenging our perceptions of justice and equality.

Unfair Circumstances

  • Born into a drug or alcohol-abused home
  • Poor 
  • Poor health
  • Born in a country where your rights are less than desired (to put it plainly)
  • Good genes
  • Born Wealthy
  • Born into a loving two-parent household
  • Unconditional love and support

These are a few circumstances that happened to you without your consent. You were fortunate enough to be born into a good situation or, unfortunately, not so good.

So, where is the fairness in that? It’s a question that weighs heavily on our understanding of the world and our place in it, leaving us feeling that the world is broken and lacks sense.

I would love to know your thoughts on this topic.

You could have chosen any blog to read, but you chose mine, and I’m honored!

~Belladonna~

38 Replies to “Where is the fairness in that?”

  1. In the past, I would allow this topic and the underlying circumstances live rent-free in my head, and cause me way more anxiety than they needed to, and now… I take on what I can control and leave what I cannot control to God. Sure there are still instances where I am like, “Wow! They got this or that, and I’m over here busting my butt,” but I pray about it and ask God for patience because, He doles out what each individual can handle. Whatever the next person has or has not HAS NOTHING to do with my life or what God has designed for me.

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  2. Seeking clarity amid recent events, I’m drawn to church and the Bible, hoping to find truth. It’s unfair when good people suffer and bad people prosper. My stoic Catholic husband believes goodness will prevail. Last week broke me, and I’m turning to Christianity for inner peace.

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      1. I think what we felt last week was a collective energy. Energy does not flow within us, but we are also one with the universe. The ones who did not feel empathy and spewed hate are soulless, and lost. We can pray for them. 🙏🏻

        Today I’m feeling calmer, and I feel that the cis also feeling a bit calmer today. We are all one, and are living temporarily experiences in human form. That why we see evil among humans, their souls are empty. People are starting to wake up to this. It might sound esoteric but I had so many “aha” moments these last few days, God has been speaking to me directly through prayer. So hard to describe this feeling and that’s the best way I know how.

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      2. Correction: Energy does indeed flow within us, but we are not single entities. We are all interconnected by the universe. We are all God because we are born in his image.

        I’m not sure if I’m making sense, but these feelings that we feel are a result of the energies of the collective, that is, those who feel an ounce of empathy and sorrow (the ones that God has saved or is saving as ppl turn to the light). These are our people. 🙏🏻

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      4. Thank you so much! Your kind words bring happy tears to my eyes. 🥹🙏🏻 I think I need to start putting my thoughts into writing and find a way to turn them into blog posts. I’m feeling called to write again, but I’m struggling to figure out how to do it. I’ll keep praying to God for an answer.

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      6. Hillary I understand this oh so well! it’s so odd but I’ve been on a journey of intentional fasting and my mind is so clear. The way I can see spirits that aren’t meant ton be around me is the strangest thing.

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  3. Pingback: Where is the fairness in that? | Ned Hamson's Second Line View of the News

  4. there’s some just born into the unfairness anywhere in the planet..but i guess perspective…here, my wife, my daughters can go outside for a run….someone born in Afghanistan, born female would not even me allowed to go to school…..we pay high taxes but have public healthcare, people born in Haiti could die just being in the wrong place…I like the line ‘I cried because I had not shoes, I stopped crying when I saw someone without feet’

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  5. Theses are questions we may never find answers for. What we can do is make a difference in our circle of influence. Each day I ask God to show me how to be MAD —to make a difference— in the lives of all I come in contact with. When I operate outside of that sphere it becomes overwhelming becase I know I can’t MAD for everyone everywhere though I wish I could.

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      1. You can find the real story. “The men spent decades living each others’ lives: one man living off welfare checks before working as a truck driver, the other enjoying a private education and now running his own real-estate business.” Happened in Tokyo. The poor man was 60 when he found out the truth.

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  7. Here’s my thing. Life’s not fair. And while some are born into what appears to be better circumstances, noise is immune. I knew parents who were middle class and educated and caring and still lost their son to an OD. I see parents at the school where my daughter teaches not listen to the advice of the school and put their kids in situations they shouldn’t, almost guaranteeing the kids will not succeed. I just don’t know

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    1. Dead on LA!!! It all makes you wonder why aren’t you taken advice from people who can truly help your child or the ones with money overload, were you to busy chasing money and failed to give your kids all they needed or did you just have a stubborn kid💔

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  11. What is fair? Wow, what a relevant question. And I’m not sure I know what to say to those born into bad situations or having catastropic things happen to them by accident. I live with heart disease and also am poor (really, not as well-off people would consider themselves poor). And all of it is hard. And I could spend a lot of time looking at those who are (actually) well-off with health and wealth. Mostly, I keep trying to endure. I also am thankful for the smallest pleasures, which come across as gifts. And I continue praying for others, since what else is faith for than such acts? I hope you’re really well and having a good week so far.

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  12. I have thought that so many times since I was diagnosed with cancer, “why do I see crackheads and drug users just living, wasting life, but healthy? Yet here I am, doing the right thing, being healthy, working and I end up sick!!”

    But what I’ve learned is that everyone is going through something – rich, poor, healthy and unhealthy. All that I can do is trust in God, love and pray for others and live the life that I have, to the best of my ability.

    I pray a lot and ask Him to lead me and believe that He will. I try to believe that all things happen for a reason and one day we will all know why.

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    1. First off you now have another prayer warrior in your circle!!! How are you feeling?
      I pray a lot to girlie and that is the only thing that will get me through. God is good.
      I remember when I had surgery to remove the risk of cancer in my thyroid.
      I’ll be praying for you and please reach out if you just need to talk.

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  14. With all of the chaos and confusion going on in the world today Queen B, that is a legitimate question to ponder, “Where is the fairness in that?” 🤷🏽‍♀️

    Yet still, we reach down into our bag of hope and pull out the sword of life that helps us to forge ahead using what we got! 🏃🏽‍♀️💪🏽🏃🏽‍♀️

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