REPOST
Have you ever loved someone so much that you looked like a fool?
You had no idea how dumb you looked until the love ran dry.
During your dumb affair, people told you how simple you looked and how desperate you were acting. But your head was so far up your behind; you didn’t notice. I know I’m not the only one who has experienced this shameful act!
So confess and make me feel better, please!
I cringe at my past self, and I hate to talk about it. But I need to because there might be someone reading this that’s in desperate need of someone to keep it real. So here I go.
I fell in love one time, and it left me with scars that not even the best therapist could fix. The guy I indeed fell in love with would tell me that he could do better and find someone who looked better if he chose to. We would physically fight, and on one of our knocked-down blowouts, I had blood everywhere. At some point in our battle, my clothes were torn, and on top of it all, I was left without a ride home.
During this relationship, I never felt good about myself; I hated who I was and, even worst, despised who I was becoming.
Before meeting the devil on earth, I was fun; I had a lot of friends, I did well in school, and my self-esteem was strong. Then I fell in love and was in agony until I said SEE-YA! And at that point he showered me with praise and attention, but it was a day late and a dollar short… I was GONE.
After that relationship, I promised myself that I would never fall in love because that shit is painful. I mean, who in hell plans to fall; Right?
When you fall, you risk getting bumps, bruises, concussions and may end up lost and confused. So instead, chose to LOVE! LOVE with my whole heart and to walk into my next relationship grounded and in control of every step. And it just so happens, that was the best thing I could have ever done.
So here’s my message for anyone that’s looking for love; “Don’t let anyone come into your life and drive you to the point that you forget who you are and what you deserve”.
We are on this earth for a short time, and it shouldn’t be a hard time.
Love, but walk into it like a champ!
You could have chosen any blog to read, but you chose mine, and I’m honored!
~Belladonna~
It is heartbreaking to hear your story. The guy sounds like the classic abuser.
He was the absolute worst!!! Only thing I gained were lessons to pass on to others. What a nightmare!
Self Love as a priority does often come from some heard earned lessons. You are amazing and powerful to turn your life around and find what works for you.
Thank you and I hope that one day I can help other women do the same! I appreciate you so much 💖💖💖
I’d be here for an hour typing up my foolishness from when I was younger. I’ll say this . . . I fell hard for a guy once, I fell even harder for a woman. Both relationships were draining and made me feel as though I was second fiddle and not worth being loved. When I FINALLY woke up, I realized I could find someone who’d love me for me and have my best interests at heart just as I do. I got out of those relationships when I needed to, and I’m so thankful I did. But they both did a number on my heart, my level of trust, and my spirit. It took many years before I could really ever feel like I could love again.
Thank you for sharing, Bella, and opening the floor for discussions.
Tre people suck! I swear some folks love to get you right where they want you and then play games with your heart. But Karma is a beautiful thing!
Real love doesn’t hurt nor play with your mind and we all deserve the real thing, we don’t need no more lessons 😩 I had my fair share.
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Amen. Amen. Amen to all of that.
OK Beyonce, you were ‘crazy in love’ and then you had to ‘call on Tyrone?’ 🤣😆😂 OK girl, I can’t go deep with you on this topic…too dark and I may relapse from my therapy! LOL All I have to say is, don’t look nor act desperate. 😲😱🙄 Or you’re in T-R-O-U-B-L-E! 😫😠😵
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I can’t with you!!! Not the relapse though 😭😂😂
I fell in love with a married man who said he was going to leave his wife. You can guess the ending to that one. After some years, I recovered and fell for a single man a few years younger. He seemed to like me a lot and then abruptly ghosted. A few months later he said the age difference bothered him. It was THREE YEARS. I’ve just had it, done!
OMG!!!! Okay so the married man, yes I know how that ended. He wanted the best of both worlds🤨
The ghosted guy was a freakin coward as well. But don’t give up on love the right one is alive and looking for you as well!
100% I agree. Love is not about obliterating the other person or yourself. A great post.
Yes for sure!!! Thank you so much 😊💖
walk into like a champ…choose to Love…not fall… I have played the fool before as well. It is not a pretty sight
To say the least🤦🏽♀️ If only I had a time machine 😂
I think we have all looked foolish to others when we lived the wrong person
Absolutely!
I am currently going through that and I tell you it is painful.
I am so sorry!!! Please staay strong and know that you are not alone. I and millions of others know exactly how you feel.
Oh, yes, girl! I can relate! 😳😳😳 When I was young (and dumb) I made a complete fool of myself over this guy I liked! I cringe at some of the things I did! When it was all said and done, I could’ve kicked my own butt up between my shoulders for it! It was a hard lesson learned!
LOL!!!! whenever I think about how I acted I get embarraseed all over again. And I’m like ohhhhh geesgh I was that cringy girl!
😂🤣😂🤣 Ooooo, girl! I do the same thing! When I look back, I’m still mortified at the crap I pulled! I was indeed, “that girl!” I even keyed another girl’s car, over a man! Lord, I was a stupid young girl! Thank goodness I’m not anymore and neither are you! We live and learn.
LOL!!! I just saaid that on another commment, “we live and learn”!
You keyed a a car? LOL girl the things we did. I’m so happy we made it out alive and can laugh about it now.
I am too, girl! One part of me laughs about it but another part shudders. Although we were in a bad place then, we made it out alive to tell (or joke) about it! And that’s a blessing and I’ll forever be grateful! 💖🕊🙏
Amen and Amen!!! I agree💗💗💗💗
💖💐🌹🕊🦋
I agréé with you dear.
We live anad we learn! Thank you so so much for stopping by Anita
I had two. I learn love, wasn’t fair. Need two people wanting the same thing at the same time. Hello dear Belladonna.
Yes John that’s for sure 😒
Candid post here Friend. I totally understand your point of view.
When it comes to discussions on singleness and dating, and even wanting to find a future partner, we need to begin from the beginning, and that beginning is God!
Many marriages that are happening, although glamorous and beautiful, many of them would not last. You know why? because they did not seek God’s face before they got married, they do not know if that person they married is God’s will for them. God is purposeful in bringing people together, and they each have things that they could fulfill in each other’s lives. God knows how everything that begins will end, and that is why we need to always put our love lives in the hand of God. We need to pray to God to help us stay in purity, and to make us ready, while he brings our kingdom spouse to us, or while he leads us to them. We need to ask God to lead the way, because only God can lead us to the person that is truly right for us. Even then, God is the only person who can ever truly love us fully. A person can love you so much, but because they are human, they are prone to hurting us from time to time. God’s love is perfect, and even when we have a partner who loves us, we still need God’s love both individually and together as a couple in order to keep going.
God is the King, and he is able to make things work in our favor.
God says in Jeremiah 29:11
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”.
If anyone reading is interested in building a relationship with God, I have a post on that here: https://christcenteredruminations.wordpress.com/2018/08/29/how-to-build-a-relationship-with-god/
There is much more to know about God. I post frequently on my blog about topics related to God. You are welcome to follow my blog to keep up with my content. Follow my blog here: https://christcenteredruminations.wordpress.com/
-All the best. May God bless you.
God’s love is truly the only perfect love and with his guidance we can learn togive lovee the best way we can. Thank yo for yourinsight and I look forward to visiting your blog.
Thank you so much. God bless you.
oh boy…I could write a book…I have to say though, temptation? nah…when I said I do, that’s it…there were, had been a few before then…and yes…..and maybe since, but, well, I don’t trust very easily and people always let you down, and I’m never worth the effort, so as the song says, love the one you’re with
You are hilarious!!! LOL
Love the way you think. Yes love the one you’re with, makes life a little less hectic.
I am glad you got away from him. I dated a guy for 3 years. Towards the end he made me cry, daily for 3 months. We were driving by a new housing development and he said, maybe we would live there one day when we were married. I went home and couldn’t get that thought out of my head, marrying someone that had no qualms with hurting me in one way or other every.day. I broke up with him the next day. It was terrible, because I did love him, he just didn’t treat me like I deserved.
Nicole that is the worse, faling for someone that doesn’t deserve you. WE learn so much about oursleves when we deal with those type of losers. Thank God you knew when to end it!
Yes, so yes to this.
I’m thankful for having having gone through what was basically a meat grinder wrapped in that thing called love and romance. From here. But back there, yikes, it was bad and even worse than that. But as with any experience that ain’t so great, it fills me with that much more appreciation for the here and now.
Amen to that!!!!!! It really does make you so appreciative.