Hey; How you doin

I’ve noticed lately that when I’m greeted with a ” Hi, How are you doing?”

I often reply with an “I’m here” After I say it, the other person says, “I know that’s right.” Then I respond with, “The struggle is real.” Here is the bottom line, I’m over it and will no longer say that mess!

What is your response when you’re asked how are you doing?

I don’t know about you, but when I ask an older person that question, I expect them to give me a detailed answer, and that’s okay with me. But it seems like the younger generation doesn’t know what to say.

Are we afraid to be judged because of our answers? Or maybe it’s because we know that the person asking ”how are you”? Really don’t want to know the answer. But they’re just polite, and it seems polite to ask.

I personally feel like, okay, I know you’re asking me this, but I don’t want to show just how happy I am to be alive. I might be looked at like a weirdo even though I would be geeked up if someone’s response to me was full of life and their vibe was on fire.

So, the next time someone proposes the question, “How are you today”?

I’m giving you an ear full.

I have so much good in my life

  • My health is intact
  • My kids are healthy and smart
  • I have a roof over my head
  • I have a warm meal every day
  • God has blessed me more times than I deserve
  • I have two different careers that I love and give me life
  • I have a husband that gives me the world and treats me like a queen

Don’t act like you weren’t warned! I am giving you a mouth full!

So be careful if you see me and choose to ask me… How are you today?

How you doin?

You could have chosen any blog to read, but you chose mine, and I’m honored.


69 Replies to “Hey; How you doin”

  1. Great post, Belladonna. Totally agree with this “the person asking ”how are you”? Really don’t want to know the answer. But they’re just polite, and it seems polite to ask.” Therefore I usually don’t go into details. When asked my go to is the turn around,” Fine thank you, how are you? ” 💕

  2. Sooooo Belladonna, “How you doin’?” 😂 Girl, I can’t complain because there are so many people out here where the struggle is real and they don’t publicly complain even if their heart is heavy and you know they aren’t doing as good as they could be. So yes girlfriend, be grateful, because there is always some worse off than you! Thanks for the epiphany! 😍 🥰 😘

  3. Aww, this is great! Of course, now I feel obliged to skip my normal, “yea, I’m good” to give a real and truthful answer! I might even have to list off a few things I’m grateful for too! Ha, ha, thanks for the pick-me-up. Love it.

  4. When I was in high school it was how are you in french, sa va I think…then a couple of us would say hello deadman (not sure if we were grateful dead fans back than or not?)….my answer now is pretty much, ‘i’m alive.’…..and Joey!…best moment ever was Joey drinking a jug of milk in 10 seconds….

  5. That’s fantastic, dear Bella. Anyway, ‘I got the answer for How are you doing? If you ask me, I will tell you that I am doing great because of wonderful friends like you, Kym, Elvira, Luisa and so many others besides my mom, brother and daughter. Thank you so much for bringing positivity and happiness in my life. ❤❤❤😊😊😊🥰🥰🥰

  6. When asked, I say “ I’m good, Alhamdolillah ( by the grace of God)” What ever may be the issue, there’s still so much to be thankful for. Unless it’s my doctor, then I tell him/ her if I have any health issues

      1. Welcome. A work out sounds good. A nice way to finish the week. I am good to. Leaving work, headed home now.

    1. Same! But if we are standing still and I’m asked I give them an ear full just like my older clients do. If you ask someone over the age of 70 how they are, they tell you the truth and I love it.

  7. I find it’s easier to give a short answer. “I’m good. And you?” Because it’s awkward when one person is going one way and the second person is going the opposite way. If you give anything other than the standard answer, you stop the other person in their tracks and you have a conversation to be polite. Or if you’re in the elevator and you get on, say hi, and say more than the standard greeting. Then when the first person reaches their floor, they keep the door open to politely finish the conversation and let the other person continue on their way.

    1. Yes that’s a pretty awkward situation.LOL
      But we are standing still and I’m asked I give an ear full and I think it’s hilarious because it totally catches people off guard.

      1. Yes I think people ask that question in a routine way so you surprise them. I read that in some cultures they only expect a detailed answer and they know the person, so they want a detailed answer. They aren’t saying how are you as part of a greeting.

  8. Most times my response, “I’m good, thanks, you?” or “I’m fine, thanks, you?” Depending on who is asking, if I’m feeling sassy or stressed, I reply with “Just ducky!” and an eye roll, lol.

  9. Some people might genuinely want to know how we’re doing, but I feel like most people just want a reflex answer. I know when I ask someone I don’t know that well (or at all) and they vomit their day on me, it’s a little off-putting. 😂But at the same time I get annoyed when my friends say “good” (or even worse “fine”) instead of telling me how they are. When I’m close with someone I can skip the small talk so when I ask them how they’re doing I’m actually curious.

    I think you’re right though, in those cases people are probably afraid to talk about how they really feel. It sucks that my closest friends don’t trust me with their emotions, but I have no control over that. Which is frustrating.

    1. That is definitely frustrating!!! When my kids say I’m alright, I feel like screaming because they don’t want to ego into detail. But after that response they don’t have a choice, I need details.
      I love acting like an old person when someone ask how I’m doing. I love when my elderly clients give me an ear full and I think I’m becoming them. LOL

  10. I very much love this piece! As a young person, my first thought is always to say ‘alright.’ However, I am consciously moving away from that response because I love the connection and honesty being honest brings to a conversation. 🙂

    1. Yes Layla I hope you do just that. It’s primarily our aging demographic that really gives you an ear full and often times they are talking about all the pain they are having. But how awesome would it be to list a few good things.

  11. I love this! I usually try to give full answers, but if something drastic happens, then I tend to stick to “I’m doing…,” for example, when my dad passed away a few months ago, I stuck to “I’m doing,” for a very long time (even currently). Thank you for sharing, and I can’t wait to hear an earful from you if we ever do cross paths 😃

      1. Thank you. The grief is the hardest part to get through, but every day, I get a little stronger. Knowing my dad was proud of me keeps me going and striving ❤️ I will definitely keep you posted. Thank you so much 🥰

  12. Belladonna, I love your new answer to the “how ya doing” question that most of us just ask by reflex. If we all gave real answers the world might pull a little closer together.

    1. I’m great, sitting back drink a glass of red wine while I listen to my husband snore. He had a rough week at work so…. I’m about to read and relax. How are you doing? Or should I say How you doin?

  13. Good post. I always typically say “Good, how are you?”. But now I may change and share a different nugget of something I’m thankful for every time I’m asked that.

  14. I love how a simple question can have a limitless amount of answers. I think we show our character by the way we choose to answer. I like to respond with my general feeling and give a small reason as to why I feel that way. It’s often started conversations you wouldn’t expect on a day to day basis. Great post 😊

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