Hurt People Hurt People

Whenever I was at my lowest, I hurt people that I once loved.
I recognize and acknowledge that trait in me; therefore, I can see it in others. However, very few will admit it.

I’ve come a long way and have done a 180 on that toxic trait. Now I’m not saying it’s entirely out of me, but I can manage my emotions.

I cringe when I think back on how many friendships I dropped because I was in a bad place mentally. I would literally let one thing send me flying over the edge and resulted in me washing my hands of that particular person. Oddly when I do that, emotions and deep feelings for that person are immediately wiped away, and I move on.

My husband often says it’s crazy how I can remove deep feelings so rapidly. And after a couple of years of making sense of my personality trait, I get it. (I’ll get into personality behavior at a different time)

A significant part of our personality, or in this case our behavior, was developed when we were children.

I felt abandoned and hurt quite often when I was a young Bella. To say that I grew pretty comfortable with being alone is an understatement. I became used to people coming and going out of our home and always with heavy chaos. My feelings were neglected; in fact, they still are, but I control who plays a role in my life. I can choose to speak to you or not speak to you.

Have you ever noticed that you can feel like a big girl or boss, so to speak, in your everyday life? And then here come the people that want to keep you where they think you should be, and you instantly feel small. They over talk you on a subject of which you are well diverse.

Have you ever noticed that you can feel like a big girl or boss, so to speak, in your everyday life. And then here come the people that want to keep you where they think you should be, and you instantly feel small. They overtalk you on a subject of which you are well diverse.

And just like that, hurt feelings come rushing back in, and once again, you are left to clean up your emotions.

When I began to date my husband, I hurt him a lot because I was coming from a hurt place. I wasn’t prepared to be with someone that loved me and showered me with attention. To put it bluntly, I didn’t know how to receive love. I had to patch up many holes in my soul and wait for my internal bruises to heal. Sadly I’ve only been bruise-free for almost four years. But I’m here.

It takes years to recover from being a hurt person and even longer when you allow your hurt to hurt someone else.

Seek help on how to heal you.

You could have chosen any blog to read, but you chose mine, and I’m honored!

~Belladonna~

24 Replies to “Hurt People Hurt People”

  1. Great post! Hurt people hurt people – but it cannot be an excuse for repeat behavior. Once realized they should be able to make amends. It takes so much strength and willingness to do the work, allow healing to come.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I think it’s really brave (yes, Brave, people) to come on here and share such vulnerable parts of yourself, Bella.. and it takes a lot of courage to face your own personal demons.
    Stay strong, be gentle with yourself, and thank you for sharing your truth. 💕

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Ah, yes.. but most of us were raised before this ‘feel your feelings’ age.
        We were taught to keep our thoughts to ourselves, that feelings are to be managed.. privately, and that if you didn’t have anything nice to say, you don’t say anything at all. Pretty hard habits to break, which you obviously know, working on doing just that.. 😅
        I’ll find my own way to sharing one day, I hope, but I’m not that bold just yet.
        Any time at all, Bella, stay strong and keep fighting the good fight!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Any time! It really is overwhelming on most fronts these days and so easy to forget that we are, in fact, in this together.
        We may face many obstacles.. but not alone.
        Stay beautiful, Bella!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. You write for the mentally scarred
    And you do it so easy, with deep reflection
    Nourished with authority and hence highlight the scars with simplicity
    Thank you, there is Balm for my mental scars

    Liked by 2 people

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