Is This What Jealousy Feels Like​

I’ve honestly never experienced this jealous feeling that I had on Saturday. I don’t know if my emotions were triggered by the rainy weather or because I was hungry, or perhaps I was just sleepy.

Whatever the case, maybe I felt what I felt, and it made me sad.

This weekend I attended a birthday party, and I was having a great time laughing and talking to all the ladies that I haven’t been able to chat with for a short while.

All of our girls were jumping and having a great time at the trampoline park and happy to celebrate with the birthday girl. Then all of a sudden, my mood shifted, and I wanted to run out in the rain and flop down in the street and scream, “This isn’t fair.”

I hope you got a good laugh picturing me looking like an idiot.

Okay, back to the story, one of my dear friends walks through the door and tells us she is,

wait for it…..


I grabbed her, hugged her, and couldn’t stop smiling. Once I let her go, I think I stood there frozen for at least 3 minutes. All I could think was she is the luckiest lady on the planet. Even though I must admit, before that moment, the thought of having more kids just didn’t exist.

Not only did it not exist, but when people ask me if my husband, I would ever consider having another child, my quick reply is, “are you crazy”! I have 3 kids, and they keep me on the move nonstop.  It takes all my husband I have to stay afloat, and somedays we barely see each other because he is shuffling a kid one way, and I’m shuffling in the opposite direction with another kid. Plus, we are outnumbered, 3 perky, energetic kids against 2 tired parents.

Talk about brutal.

But, at that moment, I felt something hard for me to describe. I don’t know what word to use other than empty.

You could have chosen to read any blog but you chose mine and I’m honored!


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